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    « Another Goodbye | Main | 2014 »

    On Being

    I stared at the reflection in the window of the flickering candle, the flame dancing erratically, almost spasmodically, drawing me in.  As I watched, as I stared, the world around me faded into blackness until nothing was left save me and the image in the glass.  Even the original candle had disappeared, lost in the nothingness that surrounded me.  I was entranced, hypnotized, lulled into a world not of my making.

    My mind drifted and unwittingly let down its guard.  This allowed the melting, the edges fading and disappearing, the bending of a normally rigid barrier around reality.  They appeared slowly, in degrees; first as mere flickers, then quick blurs speeding by, then as small clouds pulsating with light and energy.  They seemed to come through a doorway that I couldn't see, into a world that was no longer my own.  They broadcast love and hope, encouragement and peace.  They surrounded me and filled my cosmos, asking me to open up and to allow them in.  They invited me to dance and to celebrate with them, to rejoice at being alive and being a part of this experience, this creation, this here and now.

    And I knew - without learning, without hearing, without being told, I just knew - that countless other worlds exist.  Infinite other places, where black is white and white is gray, where upside down is sideways and things are never what they seem.  That we are in one of many, one possibility out of hundreds and thousands and millions, each one with its own unbearable beauty if only we learn to see it, and its own heartrending ugliness which we must learn to see beyond.  What is here - what is now - these things are fleeting, ephemeral, passing by, even though they seem to be our everything.  We are a dot, a speck, an iota containing an entire universe.  We are overwhelmingly gigantic and infinitesimally small at the same time, and to learn to live - to learn to let go - to learn to be - is to accept this and dance.

    This is what they showed me, through visions I cannot explain.  This is what they taught me, without words or sounds, as they engulfed me and lifted me.  And as they left, I longed for them to return, I craved to be with them still.

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    Reader Comments (1)

    I actually smiled while reading the middle part about feeling peace, almost nodding my head like "me too! I want to go!". This has given me a great perspective on life today...even the big things are truly little in the grand scheme of the grand. Love you, Brother, keep writing.

    July 27, 2015 | Unregistered CommenterPeggy

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